12th Jul, 2018
But Kenyan watchies…
I have never seen a meme more relatable (and I have seen MANY memes) than the one that says “Unasalimia watchie mara tatu, hivyo tu ukona deni yake.”
Where I live, parking is a problem. We can’t all comfortably park our cars. When you wake up in the morning, you are met with a sight similar to ordering a cab in the CBD. Issa mess. So if you come late, be sure your morning will start with an irate caretaker banging on your door ‘usongeshe gari ama ulete key nikuondolee’ – Also, hmph! That last one is usually a test of my Christianity. If you want to have a good start to the day, just park your car outside the gate under the trees that tower our ka-mini driveway.
I haven’t perfected the enviable art of reversing without endangering the lives of our neighborhood stray animals, so I prefer to park outside… let’s say preferred.
We got a new watchie who was obviously not with the program… It all started with my faithful hallos to the man. He would hit me with ‘Madam unaona nilichunga gari jana. Wapi chai yangu?’ and many versions of the same. Like WHO GIVES ME CHAI FOR DOING MY JOB???!!!
It went on for a while… must have given the chap like Kshs3K in a span of three or so weeks ya chai… mimi mwenyewe ata sikunywangi chai…
One day I came home to dry taps. Out of the blue. There’s no feeling that compares to having to deal with that. Even the KRA website hanging didn’t irritate me as much. By the way, wangapi hatuku-make the deadline? ? ?
So, I packed my clothes ready to go to my friend’s because we cannot compromise a shower. I found my neighbours Kamukunjiing hapo kwa parking complaining tu. Na vile sisalamiangi watu except my extortionist watchie, I just pitad and went on about my temporary moving plans. Then I saw my debtor approaching fast and if there’s anything I loathed is the fact that I couldn’t hasten that automatic window shut! So he caught me midway…
I started wondering where I would find him a note because God forbid I dare accumulate my ‘debt’.
Me: Ah, Mkubwa!
Mkubwa (and I mean the Watchie ?): Salam asana. Ni kutoka?
Me: Eeh, Hata mimi sina maji lakini nikona rafiki anaishi karibu na kesho natoka mapema…
Mkubwa: Ah, fanya hivi. Wewe rudi kwako. Maji ya kuoga nitapanga vile itakufikia. *turns to the estate shopkeeper* Mutiso, peleka mitungi tatu kwa huyu madam pale H9.
I dillydallied between basin-bathing at mine and going to infringe my buddy’s comfort. I hadn’t even asked what they were doing. My house won. I thanked the guy and told him I’d sort him in the morning but he fervidly turned down my offer. Even chasing me to go rest.
I had my night bath. I was thankful but nothing sucks like the thought of waking up early kuchemsha maji. I instinctively went to my taps and I had an amazing bath with lavender beads to seize the moment. I was to later learn my watchie physically halfway filled my emergency tank. He said to me that I’d helped him many times and this was his way of saying thanks. Mine was the only apartment with water that day before we got sorted.
Gratitude is not just saying ‘thanks’. It’s either giving back or paying it forward. Similarly, KCBae is giving back to you with the Simba points program.
When you transact with your credit, debit or pre-paid card, use KCB mobi on *522#, bank online with KCB i-Bank or use our KCB mobile app, deposit money at any KCB Mtaani agent, process your salary, or even take a loan, mortgage or insurance cover, KCB rewards you with Simba points.
These points are redeemable for travel, online shopping, vouchers, airtime and so much more!
We thought we’d spruce things up a little bit and make it possible for you to redeem for cash! Keep your eyes peeled but in the meantime, here’s how to enroll for Simba Points!
Wacha I go chanua my watchie.
Peleka udaku pia!
